The way I look at femininity is changing

Why are we trying to be like men? Why are we trying so hard to be independent? Why are we expecting men to be like women? Why do we have to go to work only to send our kids away to strangers? Why are we trying to solve all our problems ourselves? Why divorce rate is high now? Why do we keep fighting with our spouse at home? Why do men keep looking for another women despite being married? Where are we going wrong?

I recently had a realization. I was tired having to look for “money”. How nice if the money is taken care of? How nice if I don’t have to work for money! Those days women didn’t have to work for money. They took care of their children and home. But modern women not only have to take care of their children and their home, but they also have to earn money and do more to the point of exhaustion. I used to ask why only women have to do all the house chores but not men? Why men are not contributing equally to the women since women are also working? But now my thinking is changing. Why are we even working in the first place? Why do we have to be separated from our babies when the babies are just few months old? Women are struggling to breastfeed their kids since the kids are away. A lot of problems they face because they need to work.

Today, the living cost is rising everywhere. It is so difficult to get affordable houses. The rich continue to purchase lower cost house and resell or rent to poor people. The government doesn’t monitor this properly. To me, it doesn’t even make sense. Mother Earth is not charging us money to take resources from her. But humans are making us to pay ridiculous amount to get access to it. Why? Since the living cost is so high, the men are unable to cover the cost alone. But is it true? How if we could go back to sustainable living by simply ditching the “lifestyle” that most people are promoting on social media? How if we could bring down the cost to the minimum by simply choosing to do it by ourselves? How if we could build a community that is not purely money driven?

Today, most people are working in a job that they absolutely hate, but they have no choice because they have mortgages to pay. They have multiple loans, credit cards, insurance, etc. But they are not truly happy with what they are doing. If we could do a job that makes us happy and brings us income, wouldn’t that be nice? If the job keeps us close to our family without sacrificing our health, bonding time and keeps the family safe, wouldn’t that be nice? Why do we need to send kids to school for years of learning and memorizing unimportant things only for them to be stuck in a job they hate later on? Where are we going wrong?

I see a lot of posts of women complaining their husbands are not helping in the house. They are cheating with other women. Even I receive messages from unknown men wanting to have a chat, and most of them are married. Why are they even looking for another woman? Is it because they don’t love their wife? I see a lot of women complaining that it is the women that have to do all the work like chasing men, wanting communication, doing more work, etc. But the men are not doing much or not doing enough. How if our way of being at the moment is causing the men to behave the way they are? How if our own lack of femininity is causing men to be less masculine as well? How if we forgot how to be truly in feminine energy?

Feminine is considered to be soft, receptive, nurturing, tender and sensitive. Masculine is associated with being assertive, strong, courageous, and logical. Today, the roles seem to have been reversed. The men are becoming soft and tender. The women are becoming strong and courageous. If the women are strong and courageous themselves, they wouldn’t need a man. They can survive on their own. This is why marriages and relationships are failing. This is why many women are not even married. We are simply not allowing the men to be men. We do not know how to be in feminine energy.

I consider myself to be feminine. I liked flowery stuff. I liked dressing up like a woman. I liked beautiful, shiny things. But how about being in feminine energy? I recently realized I am not in feminine energy. I was trying to be in masculine energy. I disliked receiving help. I wanted to be independent and free. I wanted to prove that I can be my own saviour. In fact, I simply rejected any men who tried to approach me. I even rejected my twin flame without knowing how I rejected him. I couldn’t trust men and allow them to lead. I couldn’t even trust my own intuition. Being feminine means I should be able to trust my own intuition. Intuition cannot be wrong. I have seen many incidents in my life where it was proven that my intuition was right all the way, but I kept doubting myself. I doubted my voice.

If a man is not allowed to be in their masculine energy, his ego is constantly challenged, he would have a difficult time to be the man that he is supposed to be. I have read many books that kept emphasizing the point that men needs to feel respected. He needs to feel that he is the one who is providing and taking care of the family. The woman have to be in the receiving mode. Women are there to nurture and bring up the family well. If the women are out to look for money, who will take care of the kids? Some strangers. Today, we can see a lot of abuse cases are reported. We no longer have extended families staying together. If extended families stayed together, it would have been easier to care for the children.

Many of us without realizing tends to be critical of our loved ones. A man who is constantly criticized tends to shut down. He needs to feel appreciated and needed. He tends to look for someone who will need him and appreciate him. Whereas a woman needs to feel safe & relaxed. Looking back at my own relationship, I was “looking” feminine, but wasn’t “being” feminine. My own masculine and feminine energy was not balanced. We all have both types of energies within us regardless of our gender. Now, I’m simply drawn to just being. I don’t want to be in the worry energy. I just want to be in receptive energy. I want to be creative. I want to create something simply for the joy of it.

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